Is the dog impressed by you?!

 

I have recieved so many questions about what I mean by this, so here’s an explanation.

 

”Impressed” is a word I use because I think it expresses a great deal. There might be other more suitable words but I like this word.

 

What I mean is:

 

In all well functioning relationships between two or more individuals, one has to, in my view, be able to praise one another and also create limits. You have to be able to accept praise but also criticism (i e limits).

 

If we take for example my relationship with my partner and our son… Each time I see or talk to my partner and son I get impressed by them (almot always=). That means to me that when my partner says she loves me and praises me for something I have done I accept it and get happy (wave my tail).

 

If my partner tells me that she doesn’t like something I have done and criticises me I accept it and consider how I can make it better. I look up to my family, and thereby listen to praise or criticism.

 

Should a person that I don’t like, someone I think is unsympathetic or mean praise me for something I have done I would wave it off with a shrug of my shoulders.

If that person gives me negative criticism or tells me that I should stop with for example making TV, I would not care and keep on doing what I want.

 

Dogs work in this case in about the same way. If a dog only sees it’s owner as an individual that gives it food, is constantly irritated with everything that the dog does, day in and day out only sends out ”bad signals” towards his or her dog etc. Then the dog has no reason to listen to either ”no” or ”good”.

 

Then you might think that the dog doesn’t notice that the owners of the dog all day long are discussing who should take the dog out, that the dog is such a burden, that it was so much cuter when it was smaller… should we sell him or put him down, should we really keep the dog – it only creates vacation problems and anyway there is noone who wants to take it out anymore etc etc…

 

It is obvious that the dog feels this even if it doesn’t understand what we say… bodylanguage is sending out these signals, Even we humans feel these things. Many have surely experienced the feeling of being unwanted in a group without anyone actually saying anything about it. What do we do then? We go home and spend time with our other friends. The dog can’t do that. It is trapped.

son… Each time I see or talk to my partner and son I get impressed by them (almot always=). That means to me that when my partner says she loves me and praises me for something I have done I accept it and get happy (wave my tail).

 

If my partner tells me that she doesn’t like something I have done and criticises me I accept it and consider how I can make it better. I look up to my family, and thereby listen to praise or criticism.

 

Should a person that I don’t like, someone I think is unsympathetic or mean praise me for something I have done I would wave it off with a shrug of my shoulders.

If that person gives me negative criticism or tells me that I should stop with for example making TV, I would not care and keep on doing what I want.

 

Dogs work in this case in about the same way. If a dog only sees it’s owner as an individual that gives it food, is constantly irritated with everything that the dog does, day in and day out only sends out ”bad signals” towards his or her dog etc. Then the dog has no reason to listen to either ”no” or ”good”.

 

Then you might think that the dog doesn’t notice that the owners of the dog all day long are discussing who should take the dog out, that the dog is such a burden, that it was so much cuter when it was smaller… should we sell him or put him down, should we really keep the dog – it only creates vacation problems and anyway there is noone who wants to take it out anymore etc etc…

 

It is obvious that the dog feels this even if it doesn’t understand what we say… bodylanguage is sending out these signals, Even we humans feel these things. Many have surely experienced the feeling of being unwanted in a group without anyone actually saying anything about it. What do we do then? We go home and spend time with our other friends. The dog can’t do that. It is trapped.

 

So my point is that uf two individuals in this case a dog and a human being are to spend a lot of time close together and have a good relationship, then pre-requisite is that these two individuals are ”impressed” be eachother. It is not enough that one part is impressed by the other, and the other can consider changing family… That would be a tough relationship!

 

That’s what I think.